Embracing Kinship Care: Angela's Journey

In the world of kinship care, the unexpected is a constant companion. Angela’s journey is a testament to the resilience and challenges faced by those who step into this role. Angela took on the responsibility of raising her nephew when he was just 11. Today, she and her husband also care for their youngest through fictive kin placement.

Angela shares that one of the biggest surprises in kinship care is the scarcity of resources compared to traditional foster care. “Resources for foster families are abundant,” she notes but for kinship caregivers, it’s a different story. “There are organizations like Creating a Family and Foster Family Alliance that are trying to right that wrong.”

The emotional landscape of kinship care is also unique. Many caregivers face the uncomfortable reality of judgment and shame. “When your grandkids are with you, it means your children aren’t successful,” Angela explains. This stigma adds to the challenges of an already demanding role.

Angela highlights that while recent steps, like improved stipends, are encouraging, they are just the beginning. Kinship caregivers often find themselves at the bottom of the support ladder, even below traditional foster parents. Yet, Angela remains hopeful and advocates for greater inclusion and support for all forms of kinship care—whether it’s grandparents, aunts, uncles, or fictive kin.

Despite these challenges, Angela emphasizes the importance of celebrating the successes within kinship care. Maintaining relationships with the children’s family of origin and navigating the system are significant achievements. She also points out that children who exit kinship care through guardianship or custody often receive less support than those who are adopted.

Angela shared some advice for fellow kinship caregivers: Don’t feel shame for your situation. Advocate for your kids and don’t hesitate to seek help. If you’re not getting what you need, keep pushing for it. “It’s ok to love your relative, but be very frustrated with their choices. Both things can co-exist at the same moment.” Angela also underscores the importance of self-care, recommending that caregivers find a therapist to help navigate the complexities of their role.

Angela’s story is a powerful reminder of the strength and perseverance required in kinship care, and a call to action for broader support and recognition for those who take on this crucial role.